BOB JOHNSON RIDES AGAIN! 318
318. ALL AND SUNDRY
318. ALL AND SUNDRY
Then one morning, which at first had appeared to be like almost every other morning on the always beautiful central coast, Bob Johnson found himself accidentally buying a used tux at Studs, Duds, Suds, and Comix–on South Higuera Street, from the owner and proprietor–a middle-aged-and-loving-it Scandinavian woman named Thomasina Boswell. “I just wandered in when I saw that old sign somebody pasted on the exit door for Burma Shave, and I always wondered what the hell that stuff was, so I thought I’d come in and find out,” Bob explained, admiring himself in the full length mirror while Thomasina Boswell, for no reason that Bob could comprehend, stood admiring Bob. “And then I got tangled up in those measuring tapes, fell into that bag of tape and chalk, and suddenly here I am, wearing a used tux and having it marked for alterations by a remarkably attractive woman. I hate to say it, but I’m impressed by what I see in this mirror. The old adage that anybody looks good in a tux may have been proven about as convincingly as it could possibly be proved. But enough about me–what about you, Ma’am? Do you think I look good? From the perspective of a middle-aged-and-loving-it woman of the world?”
Thomasina really liked San Luis Obispo, and opening up a sundries shop on South Higuera Street may have been the best idea she ever had. After only a few days of buying out the stock at several thrift shops in the area, and after only being open a week, she had been sent the remarkable bounty of Bob’s accidental wedding–for which she had already sold several (non-matching) bridesmaid’s outfits, a Maid of Honor outfit, and many boxes of broken appliances and soggy combustibles and deeply soiled kitchen-ware–not to mention all the used gift wrap–and now it looked like she was going to sell a used tux, as well!
“Don’t call me, Ma’am,” she told Bob. “Call me Thomasina. And then, while you ask me, ‘What’s a dame like you doin’ in a place like this?’ I’ll see what I can do about your inseams.”
Thomasina Boswell, for no reason that Bob could comprehend, stood admiring Bob. “And then I got tangled up in those measuring tapes, fell into that bag of tape and chalk, and suddenly here I am, wearing a used tux and having it marked for alterations by a remarkably attractive woman. I hate to say it, but I’m impressed by what I see in this mirror. The old adage that anybody looks good in a tux may have been proven about as convincingly as it could possibly be proved. But enough about me–what about you, Ma’am? Do you think I look good? From the perspective of a middle-aged-and-loving-it woman of the world?”
Tangled up in tape & tux Bob may get his inseams straightened out…Thomasina is taking Bob in it seems…And if ya lov’n middle age Thomasina —wait til you get old, and lov’n retirement [best job] 👍👍