BOB JOHNSON RIDES AGAIN! 283
283. CRAZY ALGORITHM BOOM-DAH-BOOM!
283. CRAZY ALGORITHM BOOM-DAH-BOOM!
Nobody enjoys total self-annihilation with greater style than San Luis Obispo, which has already been totally obliterated by at least one Bob Johnson-made catastrophe (so far as anybody can remember) and is preparing to be destroyed by yet another, at least if Bob Johnson doesn’t have anything to do with it. “I don’t like to cause problems for other people,” Bob has remarked on more than one occasion. “But gosh darn it, causing other people problems seems to be what I do. At least they act as if I cause them trouble, but they may just be annoyed by my proximity, since they’re always getting away from my proximity as far and as quickly as possible. But anyway, this whole Alicia Keys AI apocalypse business has nothing to do with me or my proximity; it has to do with a crazy algorithm (“Boom-dah-dah-boom”) transforming everything it isn’t into really bad super hero blockbusting movies with the same title: Captain America: Brave New World. So first Alicia made one movie, then two, then four, then eight, out of every available scrap of matter she could find in San Luis Obispo, in that exponential way computers supposedly do, and now that we’re up into the mega-billions of iterations, none of us has time to go to the bathroom (especially since many of our bathrooms have mysteriously vanished into the mighty maw of Alicia Keys). We’re too busy watching all the newest iterations on our smart devices, whatever the hell those are. What are ‘smart devices’ anyway, and why don’t they make me smart enough to know what they are? Oh hell, it’s back to the army cot for me. I really wanted to watch the new iteration of Captain America in which the Captain is adorned by Lord Peter’s underpants, and wields Prince Andrew’s riding crop, and the superheroes and super-villains are all played by various Ma Mas and their Ma Mas and hell, I promised myself I was going back to sleep and now I can’t shut up! Enough! Good night!”
(Thank you, Bob Johnson. We, too, thought you’d never shut up.)
And as for that crazy algorithm (“Boom-bah-dah-dah-boom!”)–here’s the doorway! You go your way and I’ll go my way! Bah-bah-bah-dah-boom!
Nobody enjoys total self-annihilation with greater style than San Luis Obispo, which has already been totally obliterated by at least one Bob Johnson-made catastrophe (so far as anybody can remember) and is preparing to be destroyed by yet another… I too have been obliterated a time or few or many… getting destroyed on occasion is no catastrophe… but when it comes to total self-annihilation well count me out — you go your way in SLO, and I’ll go my way south of the border down Baja Way! We’ll leave a light on…